Tales from a city down under

Gosh we've been busy

2010-03-14T20:13:00.014+11:00

Whenever people ask us about our new life here in Sydney - we always say that there is always something happening. And it is true - we have never had such a busy social life. Now I will admit, most of it revolves around drinking - but we are in Australia after all, and it is the national pastime. Our friends from Brisbane - Mandy and Scott - recently stayed with us - they were off to see ACDC and we provided accommodation. As well as quite a few of Gus' now famous cocktailsWhilst they were at the concert, we headed off to a special private event - the soft opening of Rita's bar. Situated in Ashfield, this was a cool new happening spot.

Whilst I was a bit concerned to see the barman drinking his own martinis, Gus remained unfazed by it all. He kept his cool - must have been the hat!

The following weekend we had yet more visitors from Brisbane - Gus' cousin Lennard and his wife Alida. They were in Sydney for the George Michael concert - we had tickets too - clearly we are all about the same age! Amazingly this was my very first stadium concert experience - I have led a sheltered life! It was a great night - 40000 fans - and Mr George Michael was in fine form. Still sounds good and still has the stage presence and all the moves. I would have liked a bit more Wham, but he ended the evening on a great note.

The following night was Mardi Gras - the Gay and Lesbian parade. Now I don't do crowds and there was no way I was mixing with the plebs on the street, so we had VIP tickets to the Glamstand. This was banked seating, in a separate area - with its own bar, food, and toilets. Now that's much more me. We even glammed up ourselves especially

The tickets for Glamstand were sold to raise money for the Bobby Goldsmith Foundation, an HIV / AIDS related charity. So it was money well spent. And we had a blast. Great seats, a great view of all the hot boys parading past,

and commentary from 2 of Sydney's finest drag queens.

After all that excitement, we needed a break and so last weekend, rather than host people from Brisbane, we headed up there ourselves to stay with Gus' schoolfriend Kerry. Like a true South African, Kerry treated us to a braaithough I have to admit, I am not a fan of boerwurst. The kebabs and burgers were delicious though. As was our Sunday morning breakfast at Surfer's Paradise.

Now Surfer's seems to be the Aussie equivalent of Blackpool or Bournemouth - you either love it or hate it. It does have a rather faded, shabby quality - and seemed to be populated by either retirees or hippy surfersI quite liked it. Mind you, that might have been due to all the half dressed hippy surfers.

Time for a catch up

2010-02-21T15:15:00.008+11:00

Wow 2010 is moving past at a fair old pace. It's almost the end of Feb. So what have we been up to?
We saw Inglorious Bastards at the Outdoor Cinema. Situated in the Botanical Gardens, this event shows a different film every night. Tickets sell out fast as it is such a fantastic location - we did well to get seats. I had a bit of a dash home from work, but we made it, and even had time for a bite to eat and a bottle of something chilled and sparkly before the film began. I have to say that the contrast between the stunning setting and the violence onscreen was quite surreal.

Then we had Australia Day. It's compulsory on this day to attend a barbecue, eat lamb and drink too much.

We just had to obey - and despite the onerous demands - we had a good time. Thanks go to our hosts Andrew & Shane.

Our weekend in Canberra however proved less exciting. Canberra is a planned capital - all sweeping vistas and grand boulevards for the politicans to drive along. The whole place is designed to make the politicans feel important - trouble is, at weekends, the place is absolutely dead. They all go home, leaving behind a soulless city. And that's when it is sunny. We picked the weekend of Canberra's first rain in 8 months - and boy did it rain. Torrential. Another "rain event". And Canberra in the rain is a lot less interesting than Canberra in the sun. There was one highlight. The "Masterpieces from Paris" exhibition - artworks from the Musee d'Orsay in Paris, featuring Picasso, Van Gogh, Matisse, Cezanne, Seurat & Gauguin. A great exhibition, and proving wildly popular. People have been queuing for 2 hours just to get in - there ain't much else to do in Canberra admittedly. We were lucky - we were advised to go late afternoon and indeed the queue was only about 10 minutes. It was worth the 3 hour drive from Sydney.

Now we do love living here in Australia - but just occasionally we come across something which makes us think fondly of life in the UK. Like this sign, on the toilet building at a rest stop on the road from Sydney to Canberra.

You don't get that at the services on the M6 now, do you?

A retrospective

2010-01-09T14:01:00.013+11:00

That's it - 2009 is over, finished, gone. And what a year it was. We saw in 2009 on the banks of the Thames on a cold and frosty NYE, celebrating with a heady mix of bailey's and hot chocolate.

Move forward 12 months. We saw in 2010 on the banks of Sydney Harbour on a warm evening, celebrating with a heady mix of champagne, cocktails and spectacular fireworks.
So I thought this would be a good time for a retrospective on our first 6 months in Australia.

Things we love about down under

Aussies- we have met some great people since arriving here. Aussies are a friendly bunch and have been very welcoming to us. We've also met some great fellow ex pats.

The weather - what's not to like about great weather? It's been more changeable than we thought it would be, but it is so much warmer and more cheerful than back home.

Sydney - what a great city. So much to see and do. Love, love, love the harbour - taking the ferry from Pyrmont to Circular Quay is such a cool and fun way to get about.

Restaurants - much cheaper than London and a lot more choice, especially with Asian food. We have 4 great places just within 5 mins walk of our apartment.

Events - this is a city that knows how to put on an event. Whether it's the NYE fireworks, the Fun Run, the coffee festival, or Breakfast on the Bridge, there is always something interesting happening somewhere. Best of all, most of it is free. Looking forward to Mardi Gras.

Dan Murphy's - who knew there were so many different labels of Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc. We are working our way through them all.

Cleanskins - the person who invented these should be given a medal - $7 for a quality wine. Can be a bit hit and miss, but the hits are absolute bargains.

Things we miss about the UK

Family and friends - I miss my kids on a daily basis. But Skype, Facebook and this blog help us stay in touch, and they have loved visiting Australia. Looking forward to seeing them again in April. And we are always open for bookings for any friends who fancy the 24hr flight!

White Xmas - so we missed all the snow. Damn! But it never really felt Christmassy here - Xmas is a winter festival. It's just not the same when it's hot and sunny.

UK supermarkets - Shouldn't say this as I work for Woolies, but we do miss our UK grocers. There are things you just can't get down under, and the whole shopping experience is so much better at home. And you only realise how cheap Tesco really is , when you can't get to it!

UK TV - you all know we are reality TV fans. Whether it's Strictly Come Dancing, I'm a Celebrity, X factor, Britain's Got Talent, or Dancing on Ice, we watch them all. And whilst they do have Aussie versions of some of these shows, they just aren't a patch on the UK version. They have an amateur feel to them. So we are reality deprived. And as for the rest of Aussie tv - well, hmm, it really is, quite frankly, a load of crap. Probably because the Aussie life is meant to be lived outdoors.

So other than missing our families and friends, we really don't have much to complain about. We have settled very well in Sydney and are really enjoying our life here. We do feel a bit homesick at the moment, but I think that is an inevitable consequence of being away from home at Xmas. Now if I could just get Waitrose to deliver to Sydney........

Carols in the Domain

2009-12-20T18:29:00.002+11:00

Carols in the Domain is a free Xmas concert that takes place every year and aims to raise money for the Oasis Youth network - a part of the Salvation Army which works with homeless youngsters. Woolies has sponsored this concert for the past five years - it's a big corporate activity for us, as we also raise money for Oasis by the selling of Candle Bags. These contain candles (an integral part of the concert experience) as well as loads of other goodies, and sell for $15.

Weeks before the concert it's a massive organisation to get hold of the products and pack all 12ooo bags! They are then crated and sent to the various selling points for the day of the concert. It's all organised by Donna - the PA to my ultimate boss - who has been very helpful to us as we moved over here, so Gus and I were happy to volunteer to sell bags on the day.

We had absolutely no idea what a huge event this concert turned out to be.

First of all we had to find the Domain - which turned out to be the bit of the Botanical Gardens that slopes down from the city!

We got there about 3pm - the concert started at 8.30pm - and were staggered by how many people were already there.

People had even camped out overnight to bag a prime spot. And they continued to arrrive -to the point where the police had to turn latecomers away at about 8pm, as the venue had reached capacity of 50,000.

I was on selling duty with other Woolies volunteers - the hottie in the red cap is Cameron from corporate finance. He sold quite a few bags - especially to the girls! I did well when he went for a coffee!

By about 7ish we had sold all the bags and so were able to go and join the concert crowd. As hard working volunteers we had VIP access to the area right in front of the stage. It had been a very hot day so we were gasping for a glass of something sparkly!

These VIP lawn seats gave us a great view of the evening's entertainment and of the real VIP's who were in the blue seats you can just see in the photo above. Amongst the celebrities sitting just behind us were Nicole Kidman and Kristina Kenneally - the NSW Premier.

The concert was televised nationally and was great fun. A mix of popular Xmas songs with well known carols - sung by famous Australian's (we had no idea who they were - probably some actress from Home & Away) and international stars such as Englebert Humperdink (still alive apparently) and Katherine Jenkins. She was fantastic but the biggest cheer of the night was reserved for The Wiggles and their rendition of that holiday classsic "Go Santa Go". Nope, no idea either. It must be an Antipodean thing.

Happy hunting in the Hunter

2009-12-20T17:49:00.004+11:00

We celebrated our first 6 months in Australia and Gus' birthday with a weekend in the Hunter valley. This is a wine producing area about 3 hours north west of Sydney. Like all wine areas it has become a haven for restaurants and an overall foodie experience to complement the wine tasting.

Gus picked the accomodation and choose well. Patrick Plains turned out to be a great place - a small guest house with just 8 rooms, cool decor and a female owner who just loved the gay boys!

She has owned the place for about 2 years and is refurbishing it to her own style. We chatted to her about her many trips to Sydney and her search for new tables for the rooms - this was a relief to us as we had thought the god awful pine monstrosity of a table was a permanent and deliberate feature! We practically had the place to ourselves and enjoyed the privacy and peaceful setting.

Our wine tasting took us first of all to Peterson, where we were presented with a terrible dilemma

Chocolate or champage? Which one to pick first?

We really weren't sure about the wine tasting etiquette in the Hunter - we've been to the Sonoma and Napa valleys in the USA and to Franschhoek and Stellenbosch in Cape Town, and they all have different systems. Sometimes the wine tasting is free and sometimes you pay a nominal amount. Well we were obviously forgetting about the Aussie love of alcohol, as not only was the wine tasting free - but you were often given a wine tasting menu which guided you from dry whites, through reds to sparkling and then dessert! We ended up buying champagne from Petersons as it was quite delicious.

Friday night was Gus' birthday celebration, and he had picked Casuarina. This is a vineyard, a hotel and a well known restaurant. Indeed it was one of the original three restaurants that established the Hunter as a culinary destination. And it has not changed since then. The decor and the food are firmly rooted in 70's! When we arrived I did think the whole thing was going to be a bit Fawlty Towers but we loved it. It is known for the tableside flambe's - the chef cooks your meal next to your table, and chucks in a whole load of alcohol before setting it alight. With flames shooting high into the air this was a great experience - the lobster and prawn dish we had was superb - it's their signature dish.

The next night we went for a more modern choice - Botanica. With a great view of the vineyards from our table, we had a great meal - three courses for $60. And top entertainment too. Not laid on by the restaurant but by the couple at the next table. A young couple - they told the waiter that they had come down from Newcastle to see the Xmas lights at the Hunter Valley Gardens (more on that later). She had dressed up for the occasion in a stylish black dress; he was wearing denim shorts, a t shirt and canvas espadrilles! You see this all the time in Australia - the girls make an effort, the boys can barely bring themselves to put on clothes. They were a good looking couple, but dear lord, he had the manners of an ape. Does no-one get taught how to eat anymore? You bring your fork to your mouth - you don't lean down, bringing your mouth to the plate and shovel it in....this ain't Maccas. No wonder they'd gone out for the night, she probably knew not to take him home to meet Mum & Dad....

After dinner we too headed off to see the Xmas lights. Hunter Valley Gardens are display gardens - their Xmas lights display is a major attraction. And on that night it seemed that the entire population of Newcastle was there. Too many over excited children for me. Though we did see ape boy again - he had changed out of his canvas espadrilles and was now wearing flip flops (thongs to the Aussies). Clearly even canvas shoes were too formal for him.

Driving home the next day we met more of the local wildlife! These ones had much better table manners and even took time out from their meal to smile and say hello!

Giving thanks

2009-11-29T19:54:00.004+11:00

We celebrated Thanksgiving yesterday for the very first time. We've been very fortunate since our arrival down under in meeting some great new friends. One of the first new friends was Florida Girl. We met through her blog - which actually inspired me to set up and write this one. FG has introduced us to her delightful family and her own circle of down under friends - most of whom are ex pats too.

So at this Thanksgiving dinner were one Brit, one Kiwi, one Canadian, several Aussies, one South African, several Americans and some Texans - it was quite the British Empire reunion. The food was awesome. Turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, sweet potato and yam casserole, green bean casserole, two types of corn bread, two types of stuffing - it was quite the carb fest. Delicious.

One Thanksgiving tradition is to go round the table and each state what you are thankful for. So here's my blog version of that tradition.

I am thankful for the new friends that we have made in Australia, and for the warm welcome that we continue to receive. Thank you Florida Girl for inviting us into your home, for your hospitality and for your continued friendship. I am thankful that Abi and Fraser were able to come over to Australia and that they had a great time here, and I am thankful that Adam is coming over at Xmas. Finally, I am thankful that I get to share this adventure with Gus, he is my rock and I love him more than I let him know.

Aye aye Cap'n

2009-11-29T19:14:00.005+11:00

Last weekend was a hot one with temperatures forecast to go past 40 degrees centigrade. That's the kind of heat that would bring the whole of the UK to a halt - with schools closed, buses and trains cancelled, and the Sun would run pics of packed beaches in Bournemouth and Southend, with a topless young female and the headline "Phew, what a scorcher"

Here in Sydney - it was business as usual. Aussies don't let heat, duststorms or other natural phenomena get in the way of having a good time. We'd been invited to spend Saturday afternoon on a boat in the harbour with some friends and a bunch of their friends. We rocked up at Rushcutters Bay at the allotted hour

and were somewhat taken aback by the amount of alcohol being loaded onto the boat. Then we met the others - mainly Irish and in their twenties. OK - that explains that then.

Once loaded with all the essentials - ice, beer, champagne, more ice, more beer, white wine, more ice, rose wine, more ice, more champagne - we headed off for a quick motor around the harbour - past the Opera House and under the bridge - before the captain floored the throttle and we zoom zoomed over to Middle Harbour.

Here we partook of liquid refreshment.

for several hours

before heading back to land, where we continued the get together in Rushcutters Park.

Gus and I then went home, ordered a takeaway pizza and fell asleep!

Next day, we both felt a bit jaded. I can assure you it was not the alcohol - the temps hit 43 degrees. I even have a photo as evidence!

That was the week that was....

2009-11-22T14:17:00.005+11:00

The kids had a great week here - sadly it was all over far too quickly. And it will be another five months before they are back over again. We did have fun and packed a lot of touristy stuff into our time together. We visited Bondi, Coogee and Manly beaches - went on various forms of public transport -ferries, trams, buses, monorail - climbed the lookout towers on the Harbour Bridge, and saw every variety of Australian wildlife at Taronga Zoo, Sydney Aquarium, Wildlife World and Featherdale Wildlife Park. We loved the Oz Trek experience at the Sydney Tower, cycling on the swirly hill at the Olympic Park and the Undersea 3D film at the Imax cinema.

Interacting with the animals at Featherdale was a highlight, interacting with the school parties at Wildlife World was a defininte lowlight. And on that point - do Aussie kids ever actually take any lessons? Based on our experience, every school in the Sydney area was visiting a tourist destination during that week. You have not experienced hell until you have been trapped in the Wildlife World with all the glass cages amplifying the noise of several hundred screaming kids. The irony of where we were was not lost on me.

Having fun at Manly beach (despite the flies)

The schoolkids weren't the only ones fighting at Wildlife World

We proved that you don't need a car to get around Sydney

How scary were those sharks?

The giraffes have the best view

Luk Chai the baby elephant

Mother and baby

Featherdale - a real treat

Getting dizzy yet?

So kids - did you have fun?

Lego of me

2009-11-22T14:11:00.002+11:00

One of Gus' personal training clients from London was recently over in Sydney. We met up on Sunday for the Glebe street fair. It was a bit bigger than we thought.

It took us several hours to walk the full length of the fair and back again.

It must have felt like old times again for Donna as Gus urged us to feel the burn

The only consolation was that I bought myself a great pair of cufflinks - the orange lego ones. So stylish.

Rise and shine

2009-11-22T13:56:00.004+11:00

Gus and I always enjoy inviting people over for dinner. It gives Gus the perfect chance to show off his culinary skills. And occasionally I get to cook too. This time, I decided to make chocolate souffles. This was a bit of a brave move - souffles are tricky at the best of times - but in an untried oven...well this was a culinary disaster waiting to happen.

I have cooked this recipe before - using the finest Green & Blacks chocolate. So I sort of knew what I was doing - until I mixed the cocoa powder. The recipe said to add water and then boil for a few minutes - well as soon as I added the powder, it turned into a paste. I suspect that the Aussie cocoa powder is slightly different to the UK stuff. I was a tad stressed, and only felt happy after I had added the beaten egg white & sugar mix to the melted chocolate and cocoa paste and it all looked as it should.

And like a miracle, the damn things rose beautifully

and were quite delicious with the caramel sauce I made as well

We went for a summery hot pink theme for this party.

Which perfectly complemented our harbour view

I think our guests enjoyed themselves - they are still speaking to us and there are no reports of food poisoning.

Sunny days are here again

2009-11-01T17:20:00.024+11:00

Harbour Bridge & Luna Park

After a week on the Central Coast, the kids returned back to Sydney. I picked them up at the coach station at 1pm, and we headed back to Pyrmont. After a quick lunch, we took the ferry from Pyrmont Bay (about 5 minutes walk from the flat) to Circular Quay. This ferry route gives the best views of Sydney Harbour. Gus was on hand to capture it all.

Sightseeing with Gus is not for the fainthearted - he makes you work hard......so Abi and fraz were faced with a walk across the Sydney Harbour Bridge. We stopped half way at the Pylon Lookout Tower for a rest...and for the great views.

If you look closely at the photo above you can see the groups climbing the bridge itself......I am amazed that I haven't been made to do that yet. I think Gus is torn between his desire to make me work hard, his fear of heights, and his reluctance to spend $150...

Anywho - after all that hard work, we deserved a treat, so we were allowed one ride each at Luna Park.

This funfair has been on the site since 1935 - now surrounded by high rise expensive apartments, whose residents constantly complain about the noise! Well hey - did you not notice it before you moved in?

It has a certain nostalgic charm

though the Wild Mouse ride that Fraz and I went on felt just a tad rickety....

Gus and Abi went on the Ferris Wheel........this surprised me, given Gus' reluctance with heights. Then again, I find Gus' fear of heights a bit odd, given that he towers over me....

Abi enjoyed herself

whilst Gus gritted his teeth....

Back on solid ground, Gus lined us up and marched us off to the ferry

we were allowed ice cream for good behaviour , before heading home.

Bondi Beach

As we'd been good the day before, we were treated to a day at the beach on Sunday...Bondi Beach. It's an Australian icon, and at weekends gets incredibly busy, so we were up early and arrived there at 9am! It was still quite busy - all the local kids were enjoying their regular Sunday morning beach & surf safety training.

We stayed for a few hours - even venturing into the sea for the first dip of the season. Jeez it was cold.....but we had fun swimming through the waves. Lunch was at Sydney's best pizzeria...and if my kids reaction is anything to go by, the reviews are true. Clean plates all round.

The kids are alright

2009-11-01T17:07:00.010+11:00

Abi and Fraz arrived last Sunday after a long 24 hour flight via Abu Dhabi. They flew out with their mum and nan. The kids spent the day with me whilst the adults rested!

After a shower and breakfast we headed out for a walk around Darling Harbour - the weather was none too favourable

so we took a break and treated the kids to their first taste of yum cha

I'm not sure how well it went down - we realised half way through that they were falling asleep - so we headed back home and allowed them a quick nap. Determined to get them onto Aussie time asap, I woke them after an hour. This proved to be a challenge - so I forced them out of the flat for another walk. Hmmmm.....reports of zombies in Pyrmont soon followed

Fortunately the fresh post rain air and all the ions soon woke them up........Sydney weather to the rescue.

Catch up

2009-10-24T18:14:00.018+11:00

I've been a bad blogger - failing to keep my vast audience updated with my adventures down under. Mea Culpa. Sorry.

So here's a quick catch up of the last few things we've been up to.

Trip to Northern beaches

Sydney is divided into those who like the Southern beaches - Bondi, Bronte and Coogee and those who like the Northern ones - Narrabeen, Mona Vale, Avalon & Palm Beach. Living smack bang in the middle of the city - we don't yet have a preference - especially as we had yet to visit the northern ones. Quite a few of my work colleagues live in on the northen beaches so we decided to see what all the fuss was about. A 20 minute drive took us over the Spit Bridge and along into Narrabeen, where we stopped for a coffee. After suitable refreshment we went for a stroll along the beach

It's a lot less touristy at Narrabeen and clearly popular with all the local surfers. Plenty to look at especially when they are stripping down out of their wetsuits!

We moved on from Narrabeen to Mona Vale - stopping along the way for Gus to photograph the coastline

This is the view over Warriewood beach towards Mona Vale.

And this is Mona Vale itself

There's a rugged beauty about this part of the coast that reminds me of North Wales where I spent a lot of my childhood. Unsuprisingly I quite liked these beaches, and I think we are northern beach converts.

And that has nothing to do with the hot surfers...

Hunter's Hill & Woolwich
I drive past the turn to Hunter's Hill every day on my way to work, so we decided to explore it last weekend. It was a sunny day (for a change!) We enjoyed a pleasant walk along the headland which took us to Woolich Dock. This used to be the main dry dock for Sydney and is still in operation - though the lock type mechanism for draining the dock as seen below is sadly no longer there.

We did get some great views of the Harbour. It was quite a windy day so the sailors were out in force.

Hunter's Hill Sailing Club was enjoying a race day, and we watched as all the yachts were launched and prepared for a day of competitive sailing.

These boats are far too small for me - I will only step foot on martime craft that are big enough to have a pool and people to serve me drinks.

Night Noodle

We finally made it to night noodle - this time there were no firemen needed. It all takes place in Hyde Park in the centre of Sydney. We got there about 6pm - and wow was it busy. Clearly the place to be for the post work crowd. We grabbed some food, and pounced on a table as it was being vacated. Our friends joined us , and we had a great evening - top Asian food and plenty of wine. And to finish it all off - coffee from Toby's Estate and some rather fab mini pancakes. It's a good job this in only an annual event - otherwise we'd be there every week.

where there's smoke...

2009-10-14T19:54:00.004+11:00

Tonight we were planning to go to the night noodle market. I left work early (ie 5pm) and took the motorway and bridge route home - paying the toll - so that I could get there quickly. As I got out of the car in the underground car park, I said aloud to myself - gosh there's a strong smell of burning. As I said that - the sirens started in the car park. I headed into the building, and the fire alarms were going there too. I decided not to take the lift (elevator) to our floor, and exited the building. I walked round to the front of the apartment block, expecting to see a crowd of evacuees. No one was there, and I was concerned about Gus. I entered the building and could see a lot of smoke in the hallway. Our neighbour was just opening her door to leave, and we commented on the strong smell and obvious smoke. By now I was quite worried as to why Gus was not on his way out. Entering our apartment, I saw Gus in the bedroom - and told him he needed to leave immediately. Why - he asked? Cos the alarms are going off and there's smoke in the hallway.

At this point he says....I wonder if that's because I've burnt something on the stove.....

I went into the kitchen and lo and behold - on top of the stove is a saucepan, with blackened contents.....apparently it was meant to be a caramel sauce.

We exit the building, and join all the other householders who are beginning to stream down the emergency staircases. By now there are three types of alarm going - the sirens in the car park, the alarm in the building, and then the external sirens for all the five apartment blocks in our complex. It sounds like WW3 has come to Sydney.

2 fire engines arrive and 12 firemen disembark.

In full gear. Hazmat suits. Oxygen cylinders. And axes.

Axes........!

At this point, Gus somewhat sheepishly has to approach one of the firemen and admit that it might be our apartment that is the source of the problem. He leads 12 firemen into the apartment. (Now that's a line I never thought I'd write about Gus!)

Wow - great apartment, they say. Before taking one look at the saucepan. At which point, 11 of them turn around and leave. The boss stays behind, to cool down the pan, and check that Gus is ok. He is.

I have my suspicions that if one of the hot fireman had asked this question,. Gus would have fainted into his arms.
The alarms are swiched off and the firemen leave.

The apartment stinks. We abandon plans to go to the night noodle market, and decide to air the flat instead.

Throughout all this, I have struggled to stop myself laughing. Poor Gus is in a right state. His face when the firemen arrived was a picture. Especially when they took his name and a note of the apartment number. At some point, he will see the funny side of all this.

Because I can hardly type for laughing.

Whatever the weather....

2009-10-10T22:05:00.007+11:00

Be careful what you wish for......after the red dust coated the city, I'm sure all Sydneysiders were hoping for a bit of rain to wash it all away. Well our wishes came true - and then some. The last 10 days has seen atrocious weather - dramatic thunderstorms, lightning, strong gales, and a substantial quantity of rain. Last weekend was a holiday weekend and we had more rain over those three days than during the whole of August and September.

For the first time since arriving in Australia, we have spent quite a bit of time in the apartment. It was just too wet and cold to go out - especially as we had Gus' mum staying with us. We did venture out last week to the Pyrmont food market early on Sat morning - but a persistent drizzle drove us back home. I even brought the takeaway chorizo sausage & egg rolls back with us so we could breakfast in the dry.

This bout of bad weather has made me realise just how much I have been enjoying the outdoor Aussie lifestyle. Each weekend we have done something new or gone somewhere fun - and it's all been possible because the weather is ususally predictably good.

This changeable cold wet weather reminds me of home....sniff, sniff

Yesterday we took a chance and headed out to the food market over at The Entertainment Quarter. This was a part of Sydney neither of us had visited before, and it was quite good. It was a smallish food market - smaller than the Pyrmont one, but with quite interesting stalls. Lots of places serving takeaway food - from the standard breakfast rolls, to bbq chorizo, and a dim sum stall. As always, we picked up coffee from the ubiquitous Toby's Estate, and paired it with breakfast rolls. These didn't quite fill the spot, so we added some delicious pastries - a cherry one and an apricot one.

We picked up a few things for lunch - some fancy bread and fresh goats cheese. Not the cheapest of places to shop - $13 for 2 loaves! but it's only once a month. Whilst we were there, we found a shop called Bay Swiss - this is a homewares shop, part of the Freedom Group. Gus has been looking for some type of outdoor lamp - and they had one that matched our colour scheme - we are so on trend. Annoyingly they only had one left, so we had to go to the store in the city centre today to get another one - has to be a matching pair. Now we are all set for our candlelit dinner parties - just as soon as that rain stops.....

Dust to dust

2009-09-26T19:58:00.010+10:00

Quentin Crisp - the author of "The Naked Civil Servant" and the inspiration for the Sting song "An Englishman in New York" never cleaned his New York apartment. He claimed that after the first five years, the dust never got any worse. I am not sure what he would have made of Wednesday, when Sydney awoke to a bright red dawn. Strong winds had picked up thousands of tons of topsoil from South Australia and brought it over 1000km to our doorstep. The dust itself had a high iron concentrate and so was actually red in colour. The large amount of it in the air also refracted the light so that everything was red

It was a day of travel chaos as the ferries were cancelled and planes grounded. Gus' mum was supposed to go to Brisbane - her flight was cancelled as the dust storm had moved on there and so the planes couldn't land.

Gus had gone to sleep on Tuesday night with his contact lens still in - he woke in the middle of the night with a sticky eye, which prompted him to remove his lens. In the morning, he got up, threw back the curtains and panicked that he had somehow damaged his cornea!

The dust changed the look of the city. Our view of the harbour went from this

to this

By early afternoon it had largely settled - leaving a layer of red on every surface. Gus - who as you all know - is Mr Clean - soon set to with the Dyson and a hosepipe to remove every last trace of Martian dirt from our balcony. Sadly, his valiant efforts were in vain, as this morning, the dust was back. Not as dramatic as the other day, but still eerie.

That photo above reminds me of Manchester...on a smoggy winter's day. I am so used to Sydney being about clear blue skies. Let's hope it stays that way.

Walk, don't run

2009-09-20T13:48:00.000+10:00

Sydneysiders love any excuse to be outside. They also love exercise. And they are passionate about Sydney's icons - the Harbour Bridge and The Opera House. So no surprise then that today's Blackmore's Sydney Running Festival which featured a course that took in the bridge and ended at the opera house was so popular. Over 32000 entrants. What will surprise you all is that Gus and I took part....along with Gus' mum, who is here for a holiday. Of course, she now realises that life with Gus is never a holiday.....

There were several activities in the running festival - a marathon, a half marathon, a 9k run and a 4k family run / walk. We went for the family run. Well actually we were invited to join Florida Girl and her family and friends. We were all supposed to meet up at the start and complete the course together. Hmmmm - you know what they say about the best laid plans.....

So we got up early - much to the chagrin of Mrs Mostert - who was not impressed with her son's idea of a Sunday morning activity! Gus had checked the public tranpsort website the night before - we had to get the bus from near the apartment to Central Station, and then the train to Milson's Point. The whole event was starting from there. We pinned our event numbers to our chests and headed out (free public transport was provided for participants). We get to the bus stop for the 6.40am bus - only to discover that all the buses in our area had been cancelled as the marathon route ran thru Pyrmont. We head to Star City to get a cab. For the first time ever there are no cabs at Star City - just a queue of bedraggled all night revellers trying to get home. Off to the light rail station - beginning to panic that we are going to be late. By the time the tram arrives, we have accepted that we are not going to be able to join up with everyone else - especially as we receive a text telling us that Florida Girl and her family cannot make it. We board the tram and pay for our tickets - no free tranport on here as the trams are run by a private company. Now getting a tram that goes thru Star City at 7am is not for the faint hearted - it is clearly the morning after the night before for most of the passengers. There are a few others heading for the marathon - we all have our numbers on - and the contrast between the beer ridden masses and the health conscious few is quite apparent. And the smell of alcohol in the air is overwhelming. After several minutes breathing in this air - I feel quite tipsy.

Arriving at Central we head to the platform for the train to Milson's Point - and suddenly are surrounded by people all wearing running numbers. The only liquids beind drunk here are Sports Hydrators! The train fills up at each stop until we all get out at Milson's Point - leaving behind a few bemused and numberless passengers.

It is chaos as we leave the station -and the only bit of the day that is not well organised. No clear signs as to where to go we head off in one direction, only to be told we need to turn around and head elsewhere. Eventually we find the start area - just as they are closing the start for the family fun run - "You're late" barked one of the officials at us. Well we've already completed a bloody marathon just getting here I thought, as we began our official 4k walk.

At the back.

With no young children with us to justify our position in last place.

It brought back memories of school cross country when I was always at the back - only this time I didn't cheat and take a short cut.

Crossing the bridge in the centre of the 8 lane highway was a surreal and quite cool experience, and as we headed down the Cahill Expressway we took in some great views.

The whole atmosphere was great - lots of families out having fun. We reached the finish line, and joined all the other particpants in the "Recovery Area" (I so need one of these at work) We had to be de-chipped and then we collected our medals. I did think about collecting medals for the half marathon instead, but soon realised that no-one would believe me anyway.

Time flies

2009-09-12T19:27:00.000+10:00

Well we've now been here 3 months - wow how fast has that been. I guess it's gone quickly because we've kept ourselves busy. The decision to move down here was quite a tough one to take, as it meant leaving my kids behind. Sometimes being a dad means taking the decisions that are right for the family, even if it means some heartache along the way. And moving out here has given us some financial security for the next few years - which I didn't have back in the UK. I miss them all so much - to be honest, I try not to think about it. And that's why we get on and do stuff. There's just no point wallowing in homesickness or sad feelings - we are here for the next two years and so we are determined to make the most of our time here. So we treat it all as one big adventure. I think of it as the gap year I never had as a teenager - but without the backpacking!

Last weekend we headed off to the Blue Mountains - they're about 2 hours away. It's an impressive area full of breathtaking natural beauty - check out Gus' facebook pages for the full photo album. We stayed in a quaint heritage B&B - it was a bit twee - goddawful carpet and decor - but the owners were welcoming, the location great and the breakfast was excellent. Full of bacon and egg, Gus faced his fear of heights and we went on the steep scenic railway to the floor of the valley. Actually I had no idea that Gus was scared of heights - not sure how he copes with being that tall - I spend all my time staring up at him.

This weekend we hace just chilled at home. We had a celebratory meal at Wok Station on Friday evening - our local Thia restaurant. It was great - as good as Busaba...now that's a compliment. Today we headed out early and picked up some fruit and veg at Paddy's Market (why is it called Paddy's when all the stallholders are Chinese? Does anyone know? And who was Paddy?) Then after lunch we wandered down King St in Newtown and looked in all the secondhand stores. Gus bought a china cup, saucer and plate set - he is building a deliberately mismatched tea set. We christened the first two cups in the set with afternoon tea on the balcony, as we watched the cruiseliner Sun Princess depart.

These boots were made for walking

2009-08-31T17:06:00.000+10:00

Not really sure why Gus took a picture of my calves......though they are the slimmest part of me! He took this pic as we were headed across Darling Harbour to Wynard Station early on Sunday morning, from where we caught a bus. Now there's a sentence I never thought I'd write about myself - involving as it does exercise, public transport and being awake on a Sunday before 10am. Still, somehow, he persuaded me to join him on a walk from The Spit Bridge to Manly. The lure of a lunch in Manly may have been the attraction - what he failed to tell me was just how strenuous this walk would be. I knew it was 10k - but to be perfectly honest - I don't really get metric distances. I was part of the generation that started with imperial measurements, and then moved onto the metric system. I know that metric is supposed to be easier - for some of us, it remains a mystery. I can cope with millimetres, centimetres and metres, as I mentally switch them back to inches, feet and yards in my head. Kilometres confuse me. As do kilogrammes. (I still cook using ounces & pounds) And I have no idea what a kilojoule is. Of course, this may explain my current waist size.

10k. It took us 2 1/2 hours. Flat at the start, and flat at the end. But in the middle, we climbed up Sydney National Harbour Park - quite a few steep and uneven steps. The views at the top were worth the breathless panting though.

Heading back downhill was much easier, and the scenery continued to be wonderful. Spring has definitely arrived as the local flowers were starting to bloom.

Arriving in Manly I felt a sense of achievement, so rewarded myself with a chicken burger and a slice of cheescake at one of Gus' chosen coffee emporiums. Equilibrium fully restored, we headed back home using yet more public transport.

The Yanks are coming

2009-08-29T18:20:00.000+10:00

Wow - it's been one hell of a week. And for the first time on this blog, I can actually post about my work. Why? Because the secret project that I have been working on since I came here was finally announced to the media on Tuesday. Woolworths has formed a joint venture with Lowes to both buy Danks (a hardware wholesaler) and open 150 new big box home improvement stores in Australia. Lowes are the 2nd biggest home improvement retailer in the world with 1700 stores across the USA. They are based out of Charlotte, North Carolina.

This is huge news and has been all over the media - it caused a big leap in Woolworths share price and a drop in the share price of Wesfarmers, who operate Bunnings - currently the only big box hardware operator. It's been great to be at the centre of all of this - I have been hosting the Americans all week, taking them all over the place to give them a feel for Australia! We've been presenting as well as wining and dining - they were a bit freaked out by the Moreton Bay Bugs on the menu at Cafe Sydney, and I have had to translate when ordering coffee - an Americano with milk becomes a long black with milk.

All I have to do now is find all the product to go in the stores! But hey -that's what I came out here to do. Can't wait...it's gonna be fun.

It's all geek to me

2009-08-19T21:19:00.000+10:00

Finally our container of belongings has been delivered. It's been a long 10 weeks living out of just one suitcase. I am so going to throw those trainers away. Fortunately we didn't have any problems with quarantine or customs. Gus' cleaning frenzy prior to our departure certainly paid off. Just not sure now how we get rid of the smell of Jeyes fluid off everything!

The stuff arrived Tuesday. Gus was quite firm with the removal men and got them to unpack most of the boxes. Since arriving in Oz he's become quite bossy. He'd been given advice by our friend Kerry that removal men would try and get away with not unpacking, so he stood his ground. By the time I got home, there wasn't much lef tto do. Except for the technical stuff. That's your responsibility Gus said to me, pointing to a mess of wires and cables next to the tv. An hour later I had the tv, dvd, and foxtel working. Had to set the country code on the tv to Deutschland, but no-one has objected yet...

It's the pc that has defeated me. I got the damn thing working, but could not get it to connect to the wireless router. And I know that there is a good network as our laptop and netbook pick up the signal fine. Took me quite a while before it finally dawned on me that the desktop pc just didn't have a wireless adaptor. Now I am not sure what a wireless adaptor actually is - but it appears I need one. My technical skills only go so far.

Help.

Flipper has fun

2009-08-19T20:39:00.000+10:00

You've all realised by now that the real Ian never actually made it to Australia, and has been replaced by an impostor who gets up early, goes to footy matches and does exercise. Well Sunday saw this impostor on a 5k walk from Coogee to Maroubra (the next 2 beaches south of Bondi). Now I think a 5k walk on a Sunday morning when you could still be in bed is an amazing achievement. Down under though, it's considered quite pathetic. Here you haven't been on a walk unless it involves either being bitten by a snake or rescued by helicopter. One of my work colleagues is doing the Oxfam 100k walk next month - in 24 hours......Last year he managed 70k before collapsing. Most sensible people would see that as reason enough to have a long lie down...no, here it is seen as a challenge - the Aussies are basically mad.

Anyway, the walk was fun. The forecast was for a hot day - a 28 degree winter day - so Coogee beach was packed. And there were plenty of people on the coastal path - some walking their dogs, some jogging (see more insanity). The path hugged the rocky coastline and gave great views of both the sea and some very expensive real estate.

After an hour we arrived at Maroubra, which is quite the surfers beach. And all Aussie surfers are basically hunks in trunks so I was quite happy. We stopped on the side of the bay to perve at the surfers - and then we saw a pod of dolphins frolicking in the water. Quiet a sight. But the dolphins weren't content with just frolicking. They wanted in on all the surfing action. En masse they swam to the cente of the bay and joined all the surfers.

As the waves broke, they would surf in to the shore, leaping back over the crest of the waves. I was quite excited about this. Gus decided that I needed a cup of tea to calm me down so we found a quaint cafe for a late late breakfast.

Suitably refreshed, we took public transport (again something the genuine Ian would never do) back to Coogee. By now, the place was very busy, and we didn't stay long. Just enough time for a quick photo of gratuitous semi nudity.

This one is for Billy.

2009-08-16T20:03:00.000+10:00

I've never really been into sport. Whether it is playing it or watching it - sport has never held an attraction for me. (Some of the players on the other hand.......Ronaldo, Nadal....phew)

So I am not really sure why I accepted an invitation to an AFL game on Saturday night. The fact that the invite was for a corporate box, and that we would be served drinks and nibbles by our own white coated steward may have had something to do with it. And the fact that the players wear sleeveless vests and quite short shorts.

So we braved public transport and headed over to the Olympic park to the ANZ stadium. It was all very well organised and felt very safe. We wandered around for a bit, absorbing the atmosphere. Loads of families and fans of both teams (Sydney Swans and Geelong Cats) mixing well together. So not what I expected.

And guess what. We had a great time. The other people in the corporate box were good company and we all enjoyed the hospitality. And as the white wine flowed, my understanding and appreciation of Aussie football also increased. AFL is quite a fast flowing game and the last quarter was exciting. The end result was close but sadly the home team lost 92 - 87.

My son Fraser is quite shocked that I have actually been to see a football match - he is the real football fan in the family. Actually he loves sport of all types and plays football, rugby, cricket, tennis, fives - have I forgotten anything Fraz? So maybe I do have sporting genes somewhere in my DNA........

2009-08-14T20:56:00.000+10:00

I have a new flatmate. Well he's not really flat - more like a wheel shape. Gus has gone and bought a snail to keep in the fish tank with Frankie the wierd eyed goldfish. The snail is there to keep the tank clean, as Gus is getting fed up having to remove all the green algae. And this is the one thing in the flat that he can't bleach.

I'm not so sure about this. A few years back, when we lived in Newbury, I bought a biorb - basically a spherical fish tank. I had quite a few fish - mainly mollies. Then a certain person decided that the tank lacked greenery and so bought a plant from Ikea. The plant had its own free gift - a small snail. This snail seemed innocent enough - soon it was breeding like a chav / tasmanian / southerner (take your pick based on your country of origin). Quite how it achieved this on its own is a genetic mystery - but anyhow, soon the biorb was over-run. Gus started to remove them - he was taking out about 20 a day. Now I don't like escargots in garlic sauce, so he couldn't get rid of them. Then he started squishing them in situ (Gus has a dark side).......eventually we sought a remedy and bought some fish to eat the snails. Which they did, and then ate all the other fish as well. It was survival of the fishest...sorry fittest. And then, those snail eating fish cannibal monsters themselves died - presumably of indigestion. The whole episode was very traumatic. Who knew fish were such hard work.

So I am worried that we will see a repeat of the whole sorry saga. Gus does not agree with me. Apparently this is a non-breeding snail........hmmmm.....not sure how Gus knows this about the snail........perhaps they are kindred spirits..

And Frankie the wierd eyed goldfish is most put out by this new arrival - he's swimming around menacingly. and believe me, with those bug eyes, he really does look scary.

Clothes maketh the man

2009-08-08T19:01:00.000+10:00

I've been having a bit of a clothes crisis. My one suitcase contained mainly workwear - suits, shirts and ties. The ties have proved a total waste of space as open necked shirts are the order of the day at Woolies. Anyway I didn't bring that much casual clothing, thinking it wouldn't be necessary. Trouble is - they keep having casual days at work. Mufti days they are called. And I am lacking in mufti - smart mufti anyway. I do have scruffy mufti.....not exactly what the aspiring executive should be wearing.

So today I wanted to buy some new jeans. You would think that in a major metropolis like Sydney this would be easy....oh no. There are jeans aplenty - but only if you are tall and skinny. Today has really brought home to me just how active the Aussies are, as the shops just don't cater for those of us whose thin days have passed by.

And forget it if you are short.....regular leg lengths of 32" are all you can get. I am a 30" shortarse....so every pair of jeans I tried on had what seemed like several feet of denim trailing behind me. In one store the sales lady gave me a pair of skinny stretch jeans to try on....and I mean trendy urban rock star think Russell brand skinny. I looked like an egg on sticks......and they left nothing to the imagination. The saleslady quite liked me in them......mind you she was no spring chicken and this was probably the closest she'd been to a thrill in years.

We were about to head off to Chinatown where we suspected all the short leg lengths had been sent......when we saw the "General Pants Co" on George St. The salesman here knew his stuff....and directed me to a range of Levis for short, round Brits. Aussie retail redeemed itself. They fitted well.....apart from being too long......But hey, this must be a destination store for all short people as they gave me a voucher for discounted alterations. and the tailor was just across the road in the Dimmocks building. So we headed there and took an old and concerning elevator to the 9th floor. Concerning because it kept stopping and the doors stayed shut.....just when I thought we were in a rereun of some disaster movie, we got to the 9th floor. Wierd. All these shops in what was an office building. The tailor turned out to be a great find - a Vietnamese guy who altered my jeans in just 10 minutes for just $10. And they look like they were always that length - with matching thread on the seams too. Cheaper than flying home to London to shop at The Gap!

Life's a beach

2009-08-02T16:43:00.000+10:00

Another day of sunshine. It's weather like this that makes you wonder why any Aussie moves to the UK. And why all the Saafers want to come here.

And all this sunshine means that it is quite pleasant to be outside - something this Brit has to get used to. This morning we went for a walk - around the waterfront at Pyrmont, over the Anzac bridge, around the Blackwattle Bay foreshore via Glebe park and back past the Fishmarket. All in - an energetic 1 hour 50 minute walk..........good grief - what has come over me......?

To reward me for my calorific expenditure, Gus agreed to go out for lunch. Fish and chips at Watson's Bay from the famous Doyles on the Beach. We got there about 12.30 - and the place was packed. I joined the queue to order and collect whilst Gus went to find somewhere to sit. Gus had grilled Kingfish and I went for the SeaBasket - basically a collection of deep fried stuff......calamari, prawns, fish, scallops. Yes I know it's not that healthy but it is the weekend.

Gus got great seats with a fab sea view - and we soon realised why the place was so busy. Every 45 minutes a ferry arrives - and several hundred people got off each time. Took about 15 minutes for them all to disembark. And they got off the ferry and straight into the queue for lunch. That place is a fishy goldmine

There were a few other restaurants there - including the original Doyles which is a bit posher than the takeaway. We'll go there again - maybe get there a bit earlier. Leaving lunch we walked around the area - loads of people sunbathing on the beach - in winter - jealous much all you lot in the UK? We stopped for coffee at a little hidden cafe down by Redcliffe pool - again full of sunbathers and some brave souls swimming in the sea. This part of Sydney is where all the posh people live - including our friends Laura (florida girl) and Nats. It's full of huge houses with great views of the water and the city. Some have the triple - water, Harbour bridge and Opera house.........you need several million to own something here. Roll on that lottery win.

It's a gas

2009-08-02T16:22:00.001+10:00

We've been meaning to buy gas for ages so that we could finally use the barbecue. I have been a tad confused as the the gas bottle buying process. In the UK you just buy a Calor Gas bottle - probably from B&Q - and take it back when it is empty and swap it for a full one. Here there are 2 systems at work. You can buy empty gas bottles from one shop & get them filled either at that shop or elsewhere or you can buy a full gas bottle on the return when empty principle. I eventually gave up trying to work out which was the better system and went with the simplest. I bought a full gas canister at the local shell garage ($80 for the container and the gas)

Once home I connected the gas to the barbie and hooray - it all worked. No explosions of any kind. I even followed the instructions and checked what kind of flame I had. It had to be a nice soft blue flame with yellow tips. Yellow is so in this season. Then I had to cure the cast iron grillplates. Now I have had several barbecues and have never done this. Which probably explains why all my previous grills have rusted. Again I followed the advice - coat the iron plates with canola oil and heat on low for 30 minutes. Only canola oil should be used on a bbq as it contains no salt and therefore won't cause the bbq to rust. Other oils are bad for bbq's....didn't know that either. Then, once heated (and cooled) the plates were washed in water with a soft brush and then recoated with oil.

Guess what - it all worked. Beautifully non stick grill plates. Cast iron is quite absorbent apparently and the oil soaks into the plates creating a teflon like coating. They must be reoiled after each cleaning. Good job canola is low cholestorol too.

So the first bbq meal was lamb cutlets, lamb sausage, grilled tomatoes, zucchini, asparagus and haloumi cheese.

Barbecuing is always a fine line between salmonella and cremation. I hit that line and the food was good.

Here comes the sun

2009-08-01T21:21:00.000+10:00

It's been a glorious day here in Sydney. Can't quite believe this is actually winter. We went over to Bondi beach for lunch and then walked along the beachfront. There really are some great views there

It is a great spot and it was full of people having fun. There are clearly two types of visitor to Bondi, those who have fit bodies and who then surf / swim / run; and those who have fat wallets and who then eat / drink / stare at the people with fit bodies. Gus and I represent one of each type....

....

Going bananas

2009-07-29T20:45:00.000+10:00

This weekend we headed north for some sunshine. Now that's a phrase you don't often hear a Brit use!!Actually I was at a tradeshow in Brisbane on the Friday and we decided to stay there for a few days. Gus booked us into a city centre hotel on last minute .com - one of their secret hotels. It was a nice place - very central.

As usual, Gus had the weekend planned minute by minute. Friday night we dined at Jellyfish - a cool restaurant on the riverbank. They guarantee to have at least 8 different types of freshly caught fish, as well as a standard menu. Our waiter was quite fresh too - so I engaged him in a bit of conversation about the menu.......I went for the whole baby barramundi and Gus had the Moreton Bay Bugs. These are a bigger version of Balmain bugs (see fishmarket posting earlier) Both were delicious.

Saturday we were due to meet our friend Kerry, her kids and another South African couple (Mandy & Scott) for lunch. Beforehand we wandered round the market on the south bank of the river. And it was here that we discovered the greatest thing to happen to fruit since the invention of the seedless grape. A chocolate filled banana......dear lord, these are soooooo good.

There was a choice of milk, plain, mint or praline. I could have eaten a whole bunch. Instead, giddy on a sugar high, I decided to have a tatoo. Of a kangaroo. I'm just relieved that I didn't pick a banana

Gus had the same tatoo - I didn't want to say anything but I do think matching tatoos are a bit gay.

We needed to cool down so headed to the pool area where we met Kerry and her kids - Megan and Shawn, who was busy amusing himself in the water

Boys will be boys

Meanwhile I was trying to work out how I could attract the attention of the lifeguards.......

Boys will be boys

A nice cup of .....

2009-07-27T20:15:00.000+10:00

The following day saw us up early again and heading into the City centre for the Aroma festival. Aussies sure do like their coffee and this was an entire festival devoted to the stuff. You can just imagine how excited Gus was........

I thought there would be a few stalls and a handful of visitors. How wrong can you be. There were loads of stalls. And it was a good job we got there when it started at 10am, as by 11.30 it was packed. There must have been thousands there - all of them queuing for coffee, drinking coffee, buying coffee beans. Honestly, if they ever run out of coffee in this city, the place would riot. The air was thick with the smell of caffeine addiction.

I really wanted a cup of tea.

There were even camels.

Not sure why they were there. Though of course, coffee and camels do go well together (cigarette joke)

I'm feeling old

2009-07-27T19:58:00.000+10:00

Given that I spend Monday to Friday immersed in the world of Aussie retail - you would think that weekends would provide some welcome relief. But no - the gay gene wins out everytime. And so we get up early and head out to a new area of Sydney each and every weekend. The weekend before last saw us in Glebe. This is a young & trendy part of town - actually a bit hippy. We started the day in - guess what - one of Gus' coffee shop finds. This one was quite cool - in a second hand bookshop. It was a funky kind of place, and the baristas were cute, which is always a bonus. Then we went across the road to the market. Each of the markets we have been to so far have been different - this one was a bit of a hippy, crusty kind of market - the kind where the stallholders all turn up in beat up old VW camper vans with flowers painted on the side. My sister Amanda would love it here. There were some great stalls - I wanted to buy some cufflinks made from lego bricks - Gus told me I was too old to wear them. He does that a lot. I'm still in my twenties in my head. Sadly not around my waist though!

Quite a lot of the stalls were second hand clothing. Not my scene really. I can't see myself buying clothes from someone who looks like they need a good wash. God I sound like my dad!

2009-07-23T19:31:00.000+10:00

I have a backlog of news. And all of it is very exciting........first of all BBQ news. We bought this bbq from Barbecues Galore. It's a great shop with a category killer range. Given the time of year - they were on sale, and we got a good deal. I even managed to negotiate extra discount - something I would never think of doing back home. I'm becoming Aussiefied. So here are the before and after pics ......didn't take too long to put together.

We haven't used it yet - need to buy a gas cylinder first. At the moment it just looks good on the balcony. Note how it co-ordinates beautifully with the garden furniture - also a great relocation buy! If what the Aussies tell us is true and the weather will eventually enable us to eat outside for 8 months of the year, then this is our dining table. Just needs some wine and some of Gus' cooking to complete the look!

2009-07-14T17:39:00.000+10:00

Apologies to all my loyal readers for the lack of posts - I haven't really wanted to type much in the evenings. Since I arrived here, I have had a tingling sensation in my right hand - specifically my index and middle fingers. They have also been numb at the same time - a bit like pins and needles. I do have a habit of sleeping on my hand and waking up with a dead arm, so I assumed it was that and would go away. Well it didn't - in fact it spread up my arm - only intermittently. I found that driving and typing made it worse.........

So yesterday I finally booked myself a sports massage here in Pyrmont. The guy was very good and said he thought I had trapped the median nerve. He did give me a deep tissue massage on my shoulder, neck and arm and suggested that I see a doctor to find out what was causing it. So this morning, not really knowing much about the Oz health system I rang Health Direct. This is like NHS direct in the UK. You describe your symptoms and they tell you what to do. So I did. And they told me to go to the emergency department of my nearest hospital......within the next hour.

Bloody hell. A bit dramatic or what....the nurse on the phone said that my symptoms could be caused by either something minor or serious so they wanted me checked out. Fortunately as a Brit, I am covered by a reciprocal health agreement between the UK and Australia (proof that "The Empire"really can strike back) so I didn't have to worry about the cost. I have insurance anyway but it's good to know that my tax dollars are following me here.

Our nearest hospital is the Royal Alfred in Camperdown, so off we went. We were met at the door of the emergency reception by a volunteer who told us what to do. Very helpful. I presented myself and my passport at reception and was given a form to fill in. I then had to sit on the red seats and wait to be seen by a triage nurse. I waited about 5 minutes whilst she dealt with the patient who had arrived just before me (this was at 8.30am so it was quiet there) . My turn came, and I had to explain my symptoms. Blood pressure and pulse checks established that I was not having a stroke (wrong arm anyway) and then she shone a light into my eyes. Not sure why. My eyes are a deep hazel and quite lovely. She then gave me a wristband to wear which meant I was now in "THE SYSTEM" and would soon be seen by a doctor.

We now went and sat in blue seats (seating colour in hospitals is a whole new experience - Newbury hospital has the same system, and woe betide anyone who sits in the wrong colour seat). Gus went to get a coffee. Whilst he was gone, another young nurse (sadly female) came and shone her torch in my eyes. Word had clearly gone round.

So we sat on our coloured seats and waited. And waited. People came. Very few went. Once you have been through triage, you are seen in order of emergency, so it was a relief that I wasn't rushed through. After about 2 hours, we were called to see a doctor. A series of tests later, she states that she wants to talk to her boss. We go and sit in the blue seats again. And wait. They both turn up after about 10 minutes, and he redoes the tests she had done. And then, he does some new ones.......

Lo and behold - a diagnosis.

Carpal tunnel syndrome.

Tyler the sports masseur was right - I have trapped the median nerve, but in my wrist, not my neck. The median nerve runs through the carpal tunnel right where you would take your pulse. It's a common enough condition, often brought on by sport.

Stop laughing.

So I now have a wrist splint.

A black one.

It looks like I am in mourning for Michael Jackson.

Who needs Masterchef?

2009-07-05T17:16:00.000+10:00

Oh baby, baby

2009-07-05T15:40:00.000+10:00

Whatever happened to lazy Sunday mornings? Well they are clearly now a thing of the past, as Gus embarks on his get me up early regime. This morning we headed out at 8ish for breakfast over in Paddington - at a place called Tiger Mottle. It's one of the many places that Gus has found during his current exploration of Sydney. It's in a very trendy section of Paddington called Five Ways - so trendy that it is the location for a branch of Thomas Dux - the upmarket grocery chain just launched by my employers.

Breakfast was very good - Billy's Bubble and Squeak - I was expecting (hoping for) something fried, but no, this is a trendy, wholefood, organic kind of area so it was an interpretation. For the non-Brits - Bubble & Squeak is usually made with left over cabbage and potato, formed into patties and fried. Like a hash brown, but with green bits in. Billy's version was much healthier - freshly cooked cabbage, bacon and roasted potatoes with 2 poached eggs. I'm sure the eggs were free range - they probably had the hens out back.

The only problem was that we felt slightly out of place - not because we are gay, oh no, it was a gay friendly place - the grill wasn't the only thing that was flaming....no, the issue was that we didn't have a child in tow. Specifically a baby or toddler that we could then show off to all the other customers. This seemed to be the main reason for people coming here - to display their kids. Quite what a baby in a highchair is going to do with a babycinno (frothed milk in a cutesy small cup with a sprinkling of chocolate) is beyond me.

I didn't take my kids out to trendy cafes on a Sunday morning when they were younger. They were given a bowl of sugary cereal and plonked in front of the tv to learn about the world - well the world of cartoons and japanese toy based action shows - which is a much better preparation for the harsh realities of life. Once you know that the actor who used to play the Red Power Ranger (it's morphing time) is now a bit player in bad gay porn movies, you will soon buckle down and study hard at school.

This little piggy went to market

2009-07-05T15:08:00.000+10:00

Yesterday we were up bright and early. Gus refuses to allow me a weekend lie in as he says it will get me into bad habits. I quite like my bad habits, but anyway. We headed over to the Pyrmont food market - which takes place once a month just in front of Star City casino. We are a five minute walk from it, and thought that by leaving at 7.30, we would get ahead of the crowds. Well, the market began at 7am, and it was busy when we got there. The longest line was for the Toby's Estate coffee, so whilst Gus joined that, I went and bought breakfast - organic beef sausage in french bread. We could also have had bacon and egg in a toasted sourdough bun, or award winning chorizo and egg in a bun (don't know whether it was the chorizo, the egg, the bun or the unique combination that won the award). After a brief refreshment stop, we toured the many stalls. The choice was varied and the produce was all excellent quality. We came home with some potted herbs (mint and Greek basil), some fig, apricot and almond bread, and some courgette flowers which had been picked that morning. Oh and also some Saltbush lamb - similar in principle to the Saltmarsh lamb from France I think.

So guess what we had to eat yesterday..........

Lunch - fig bread with cottage cheese, topped with chopped Greek basil.
Dinner - grilled Saltbush lamb, with salad, roasted veg, and courgette flowers which Gus had stuffed with a tasty combination of ricotta, goats cheese, and tahitian lime rind.

Both meals were delicious - and kudos to Gus for his first attempt at cooking courgette flowers - it was a triumph.

Location, location, location

2009-07-03T19:55:00.001+10:00

Our apartment building is the one with the yacht mast going thru it.....

Our apartment is on the first floor above the entrance to the parking garage

And this is our view...........plus cruise liner

Home sweet home

2009-06-28T16:39:00.000+10:00

Gosh it's been a busy first 2 weeks here in Sydney. And quite stressful too. Starting a new job in a new country on the other side of the world does take it out of you. Especially a job that means I have to get up at 6am. Now you all know I am not a morning person. Gus is annoyingly perky first thing in the morning - I don't get going till way past lunch. Aussies all seems to start work early, and the Sydney traffic means a dawn alarm call is compulsory. And I have been quite tired as a result. And I don't think I should blog when I am tired, as I do find it hard to be witty when I am struggling to keep my eyes open. I've had some blog feedback that I sound sad - worry not. I was just stressed and tired.

I'm really enjoying myself here, and I am so happy at our new place. We moved in today - though transporting our meagre possessions is not really a house move. The bulk of our stuff is still on the high seas - hopefully - and will arrive at the end of July - also hopefully. Meantime we are making do. Which in the midst of the current credit crunch is so on trend. Of course we are making do on brand new white leather sofas with a new fridge/freezer and washing machine, but they were essential purchases. And bought in the sales, so actually we were doing our bit to stimulate the Australian economy.

So we are sitting here on the sofa, watching the rain clouds roll over Sydney, drinking sauvignon blanc and snacking on cheese and crackers. The lights of the city are just starting to come on. Magical.

The views from our balcony

Need for Speed

2009-06-25T08:58:00.000+10:00

My commute from Balmain to Bella Vista is taking me about 35 minutes, though I am leaving at 6.30am! It's not a bad route at that time in the morning, and it does eventually bring me onto the M2 Hills motorway. This is a toll road - I've been paying cash each day whilst I wait for my E tag to arrive.

There is one thing that bugs me though - and that's the speed limit. Not the absolute level of the speed limit (I still have no idea what 100km is in miles per hour). No - it's the fact that even on the motorway, the speed limit is constantly changing - sometimes it's 100km, sometimes it's 80, or 70 or even 60.........and these limits can apply for only a couple of hundred meters, so by the time you have slowed down, you can speed up again. Surely it would be safer to have all the trafiic moving at a constant speed rather than slowing down and speeding up all the time. I think most of the Aussies ignore the changes anyway. And don't even get me started on the state of the road surface on a road I am paying to drive on.........

A Swedish (meat)balls up

2009-06-21T14:10:00.000+10:00

One advantage of still being a bit on UK time is that we wake up early and can get out and about before the crowds. So today we were at Ikea just before the store opened at 9am. We had been here earlier in the week and had seen some sofas we liked as well as a desk. As soon as the barriers were opened (actually red & white scene of crime tape) we raced to the furniture department to grab a staff member who are as rare as hen's teeth. Gus stayed with her to check & reserve the stock whilst I went and sat down on the sofa in question. Not because I am lazy - but to check how comfortable it was. And I just wasn't sure. I have short legs.....Gus has long legs - so for me, the depth of the seat is important. This felt a bit too deep. But it was the right shade of white and Gus loved the style so we went ahead and bought it. Along with the desk and some cheap as chips bits and peices from the marketplace which we will need before our furniture arrives. We'd asked about delivery and had been told that all we had to do was collect our stuff at the collection point and then push it to the delivery company's desk who would charge us about $140 to deliver it. Bit steep I thought but we didn't have much choice in the matter. So we queue to pay. Then we queue to collect the goods. And whilst we are waiting I pop across to the delivery people to check out the price, only to discover that they only do next day delivery. Big problem. We don't get into the new flat until Friday. Slightly pissed off that no-one had told us this on the furniture department when we asked about delivery, we ask at the collection point if we can collect the goods later in the week. No - they have to be collected now. Well they don't fit in the car (VW Golf) and we can't get them into the new apartment, so we have no choice but to cancel the collection. We then have to queue again for a refund.

I am secretly relieved because I wasn't really that keen, but I daren't say anything as Gus had set his heart on them. We leave Ikea and go for lunch in the foodcourt in the mall - Rhodes shopping mall in Homebush - quite a nice place. We head home. Not really saying much. Gus is directing me along the Parramatta Road (the satnav is on and also giving me instructions - I must be some sort of masochist) when I see a big furniture store called Milano on the other side of the road. So we do a U-turn and call in. We are in Leichhardt - which is the Italian area of the city, so no surprise that this place has Italian furniture. All at sale prices. We try a few sofas and then actually find one we both like. I ask the salesboy (anywhere else his jeans, jacket, open necked shirt and fancy shoes would set off my gaydar - but here he's just being true to his ethnicity) whether they have stock available. Only the floor model he says -which he then offers us for a generous discount. Sadly he didn't throw himself into the deal - but hey, we now have new Italian leather white sofas for the same price as the Ikea ones.

So we bought furniture, returned it and bought different furniture all in the same day. We are Olympic standard shoppers. Now I need a cup of tea, a biscuit and a lie down.

Spend, spend, spend

2009-06-20T19:07:00.001+10:00

The rental market here is subtly different to back home. All apartments - or units as the Aussies call them - have to have tumble dryers - to stop you drying your washing on the balcony. I guess they don't want Sydney to look like Hong Kong...But they don't come with washing machines or fridge freezers. So today we headed off to spend my relocation allowance. We went to a couple of malls that specialise in furniture and white goods in Alexandria. First stop - Bing Lee - where every price is negotiable. We negotiated our prices on the products we liked (basically the cheapest washer and f/freezer) and then went next door to The Good Guys, where we got even more off...and 6 months supply of Omo. That's Omo - it's a washing powder. Stop sniggering.

We also needed to replace some of the other stuff we couldn't bring with us. That's the thing about a relocation allowance - you either spend it or lose it. And there is one benefit to arriving here in the middle of winter - all the sales are on. And as today was another day of rain, it was the perfect day to shop till we dropped. We needed to get sofas and garden furniture. It may seem odd to the Brits to buy garden furniture in winter - but Aussie stores stock them all year round. In fact, when your store is called Barbecues Galore, or The Outdoor Furniture Store, you have little choice. So we got a great price on a garden furniture set. We decided to buy that rather than replace the indoor dining set that we couldn't bring from the UK (wicker of mass destruction) because we reckon we will eat outdoors more than we will eat inside. That's the plan anyway - based on hope rather than our experience so far of the weather in Sydney......

Tomorrow it's off to Ikea to get the sofas.........

New apartment

2009-06-20T18:41:00.000+10:00

Picking an area to live has been a balance between being as close to the city as possible without making my commute a nightmare. Because Woolworths are based to the north west of the city, we always knew we had to live somewhere in the Inner West or the lower North Shore - basically these areas are close to the harbour and to the west / north west / north of the city centre. Our search centred around Pyrmont, Balmain, McMahon's Point, Milson's Point and Kirribilli. We did a lot of research before we came on various property websites and read as much as we could about the various suburbs. Woolworths employed a relocation company to help us, and on our second day here we had an orientation tour which showed us the areas we had selected. We also looked at a few properties. We dismissed Milson's Point immediately as there is a lot of road noise from the Bradfield Highway, and all the properties were quite high rise. During my pre-work week we visited all the areas and got a good idea of them - Kirribilli has great views of the opera house and bridge but is ridiculously expensive - it is where the Australian PM lives. McMahons's just doesn't have much available.

We liked both Balmain - where we are currently in temporary accomodation - and Pyrmont, which is closer to the city centre. Balmain is trendy in a yummy mummy kind of way - and at times it's a bit knit your own organic tofu. Great cafes and restaurants and shops that stock stuff that no-one actually needs. Suits us perfectly. The main issue is the traffic - all those yummy mummies drive huge 4x4's - the Aussie equivalent of Chelsea tractors - and Balmain just wasn't built for them. In fact Balmain used to be the working class housing for all the dockworkers, so there is not much parking at all. Most of the properties don't have driveways or garages - and I am too old to be on the street!!!! Pyrmont used to be the wharves where the Balmain inhabitants worked - it's now an up and coming area with new apartment buildings. So we've picked Pyrmont - and have agreed a rental on a place in Point Street. It's what the real estate agents describe as a 3/2/2 - that's 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and 2 car park spaces. It's a five minute walk to Star City, and 15 mins to Darling Harbour - very convenient for the city and all its attractions. And the view from the balcony is wonderful. We're open now for bookings through to end 2010.

We move in next weekend.

5 weeks before our furniture arrives.........................

New job

2009-06-20T18:32:00.000+10:00

So I started my new job on Thursday, as Senior Merchandise Manager non-food for Woolworths. I am based in their support centre in Baulkham Hills which is to the north west of the city. It's about a 35 - 40 minute drive from Balmain depending on the route I take. The office building is huge - about 3500 people work there - Woolworths are Australia's second biggest employer. It's an impressive facility with 2 cafes, a supermarket, a gym - all of which are well used. I spent my first 2 days meeting the other members of my team and getting to know my way round the building, as well as my way to / from work. Before leaving the UK we downloaded a map of Oz for our sat nav - it has been a godsend. Especially Thursday night, when the torrential rain meant that it was quite a tricky drive back. The first 2 days must have been good as I am planning to go back there on Monday......

Something smells fishy

2009-06-19T19:45:00.000+10:00

On my last day before starting work, we decided to go into town as it was another Sydney rainy day. It is winter here after all. We took the bus down to the ferry terminal at Balmain and hopped one stop over to Darling Harbour. A brisk walk later we are at the Queen Victoria Building - the QVB. This is a stunning building, and now houses a range of shops and cafes. We resisted spending any money here which was a major achievement. Then we popped into Meyr - one of Sydney's biggest department stores. We had 2 objectives - find season 1 of Kath & Kim, and look at sofas. Result - the Virgin section had the dvd we wanted. And in the furniture department we met sales assistant Marie, who was fun, knowledgeable and despite being shorter than me, walked quicker than Gus. He has now used her as an example of why I should be able to keep up with him. Of course, he hasn't realised the real reason I'm always bringing up the rear.

Lunch was taken at the fish market - this is still a working port right in the centre of Sydney. You can buy the freshest fish or seafood, or eat it right there. We wandered round intrigued by all the varieties of fish that we have never seen before - and then we saw Balmain bugs. What the **** are these - they look like something out of Jurassic Park. Scary.

This pic is for Adam

And breathe....

2009-06-17T07:49:00.000+10:00

Gus is the most organised person I know. He is a planning machine. And he does like to fill the day with activities. Holidays with Gus are organised with military precision - the day starts early, and runs like clockwork, with the occasional break for cups of tea. So this is why I am behind on my blogging - by the time we have got home, the jetlag has kicked in and I just can't think of anything to say.

Sunday we were supposed to go to Manly - but the weather was overcast so we went to Bondi Junction instead. Now nothing annoys Gus more than a plan thwarted, so when Monday dawned bright and sunny - the trip to Manly was inevitable. First though we had to go into the city to verify our identities at the bank. The staff at Westpac were friendly and helpful - but dear lord, their computer system was a nightmare. Clearly invented by someone in marketing who never actually deals with real people, it was all about relationship building. So we had to answer questions about our goals - I so wanted to say that my only goal was to get the account opened and get the **** out of there - but it wasn't the fault of the delightful Armenian lady who helped make up non-committal answers - so I remained polite.

Account opened and money withdrawn - we were down to our last $20 so it was a relief - we took the ferry over to Manly.

Hmmmm - now Manly is an iconic Aussie location so I need to be careful. Lets just say it wasn't what we were expecting. It was like Brighton or Blackpool - a bit tacky. Some nice older architecture and a good beach though. We had a nice lunch of fish and chips on the beach, walked along the promenade, had some delicious Royal Copenhagen ice cream, and then got back on the ferry to Sydney. An hour and a half in total in Manly. We were a bit ashamed we had stayed so little time there, until we saw quite a few of the people we saw on the ferry coming out on the same ferry back.

Up the junction

2009-06-14T15:17:00.000+10:00

It's a rainy, overcast day so we abandoned our original plans to go to Manly beach, and headed to Bondi Junction instead. This is a huge shopping mall - built by Westfield (who've just done the one in White City, London). We arrived about 9.30 - it only took 20 minutes from Balmain, and parked in the first parking area we found. This happened to be by a Woolworths - Australia's biggest grocery chain and my new employers. The store looked much bigger than the one in Balmain, which is quite small and overtrades, so we popped in to pick up a few things. It was very impressive - great fresh food area.

Then off for a wander around the rest of the mall, including a refreshment stop at Gloria Jeans. Now, if this store name makes you think of designer denim, then you are as old as me, and can recall those very annoying Gloria Vanderbilt designer jeans ads from quite a few years ago. It is actually the Aussie equivalent of Starbucks - indeed the store we went to was inside a Borders. Gus is busy trying all the coffee chains to find his favourite - and this one was quite good.

The mall was excellent - it made us feel quite warm and fuzzy to be shopping in a great mall on a rainy day - just like home. Gus bought some Asics trainers - the mad trainer washathon has resulted in the only trainers he actually packed in his case being too tight. Then we had lunch in the Harbour Room - actually a posh food court. Great views of the bridge, and a fab choice of eateries; mainly Asian. We mixed some Japanese tempura and some Korean sushi rolls. There is another food court at the other end of the mall with McDonalds, KFC and other less trendy outlets.

The drive home proved a challenge. I am relying on the satnav to get us round Sydney - and the instructions are sometimes quite vague. The phrase "Keep left then keep right" resulted in me taking the wrong turn, and before we knew what was happening, we were in the Eastern Distributor tunnel. At which point, the sat nav goes quiet and I have no clue where I am going. So I head for City north, hoping for the best. This turned out to be correct - though that short tunnel ride cost $5 in toll....bloody hell. There are tunnels and bridges all over Sydney - some have tolls, some don't, some of the tolls are e-tags where you have to pay in advance - it is confusing - almost as if the government wanted to trick you into giving them money........surely not!

Life in beige

2009-06-14T08:17:00.000+10:00

Looking for a rental property here in Oz is a slightly different process to back in the UK. Properties are advertised with an inspection date and time - say Saturday 10.30 to 10.45. Everyone who is interested in that property then arrives at the same time for a simultaneous mass viewing. At the cheaper end of the rental market this can mean up to 40 couples in one place together. If you like the place, then you pick up an application form there and then and fill it in along with anyone else who likes it. We are looking at a higher end of the rental market (no surprise there) but even yesterday, when we went to see a place on St George's Crescent in Drummoyne, there were 2 other couples. Now this place had great views - we are only looking at waterfront properties - but I just didn't like it. Why? Well the whole apartment was beige - the walls, the carpets, the doors, the skirting, the windows, the blinds, the wardrobes, the kitchen - everything was the same damn colour. It was beyond depresssing. And the apartment we looked at on Friday was exactly the same.

What is going on? Do Aussies not like colour? I know that magnolia walls are common in the UK - but beige everything...........

The big picture show

2009-06-13T19:35:00.000+10:00

Gus has been freaking out that he has been taking all these pictures and no-on has seen them. So today I loaded them onto his laptop so that I could post them on here. So here goes. Our move. In glorious technicolour.

We're here, we're queer, get used to us......

2009-06-11T17:49:00.000+10:00

The boys have landed. Being in Upper Class we got off the plane ahead of all the plebs in economy (let's face it - that's really why we all fly up front - to lord it over everyone else) The flight from HK was uneventful - though Gus was somewhat enamoured of a Spanish air steward - all tall, dark and brooding. That may explain what happened at immigration - hmmm - Gus went first - no probs - however, I got hauled to one side. I was slightly concerned at this point - fortunately no rubber gloves were donned, and the problem turned out to be minor. My middle name was not on the electronic copy of my visa. Of course, when I got thru to baggage claim, Gus was standing all innocently at one end of the carousel and the hot spaniard was at the other. I don't trust these foreigners.

Live from Hong Kong

2009-06-10T20:10:00.000+10:00

I have flown on quite a few flights and I have never seen someone get off the plane before we have taken off. Until last night - when two passengers were disembarked, along with their baggage before we had even left Heathrow. I was in seat 2D so I had a frontrow seat for all the trauma. The first was a Chinese lady who took one step onto the plane and collapsed. Much discussion took place - conveniently translated for the benefit of those of us who are nosy (actually it was for the ground crew) - I think most of us thought she was very drunk - she claimed she had a possible brain tumour and was on medication (see Kerry Katona) - she even got out the box to prove it. The lack of a doctors note did not help, and even if she was ill - she shouldn't have been flying anyway. What was most bizarre was that this all took a good half hour, and the crew eventually had to go and look for her husband who had blithely headed off to his seat. He decided to stay on the flight - leaving her behind. I sense a deeper story.

The second passenger got off voluntarily - due to Cystitis, as was loudly discussed by the crew. Now - ladies help me out here - would it really stop you flying? Maybe Virgin didn't have any yoghurt onboard - but I would gladly have given up my cosmopolitan so the poor woman could have some cranberry juice. Perhaps her yoghurt had been confiscated at security....

All this - and a celebrity onboard. Why is Peter Andre in Hong Kong?Is he fleeing the country to escape press attention? I wanted to go and take a photo of him asleep in his Upper Class seat and sell it to Heat magazine for £200 - but I just couldn't channel my inner paparazzi. Sometimes I am just too English.

And they're off

2009-06-10T05:56:00.000+10:00

That's it. No more goodbye's. We are in the Virgin Clubhouse at Heathrow waiting to board. Actually we are sipping champagne at the bar, and wondering whether Peter Andre, who has just arrived with a camera crew in tow, is going to be on our flight.

Today has been a tough day. Saying goodbye to my kids was always going to be hard. As a distraction, I took them to Fortnum & Mason's ice cream parlour - great cakes and huge ice cream sundaes. Fraser had the Chocolossus - it was enormous and defeated him. Gus, Abi and I stuck to various types of chocolate cake. We are so going to need to diet when we arrive.

The kids enjoyed themselves, and it was a fun time - until we had to part ways. Tears followed. It's good to let these feelings out though. So I am full of conflicting emotions as I sit here - tired, excited, apprehensive and a little sad. I am looking forward to my new job and new life - but I know that I am going to miss my family and friends so much. I am glad that Gus is sharing this adventure with me - hopefully as people come and visit, we can share it with them too.

So long, Farewell, Auf Weidersein, Adieu

2009-06-09T17:32:00.000+10:00

These farewell tours are exhausting. No wonder the Rolling Stones only do one every few years. I will have to add pics when we get to Sydney and I can figure out how to get Gus' camera to talk to my netbook. At the moment, my brain is too befuddled to work it out. Blame stress or alcohol - your choice.

We had a great barbecue on Sat night here in Chelsea where we are staying with Tanya & Kostas. Tanya is an Aussie refugee - having escaped Adelaide 22 years ago. Kostas provided great Greek food and did his man thing in charge of the bbq. Nice sausage Kostas. The guest list consisted of the creme de la creme of London society - well the society of people who know us anyway. Roslyn & Denton (also Aussie refugees from Adelaide - the murder capital of Australia apparently) came armed with copious amounts of champagne (thanks guys). Allen (American) and Rose (South African) gave us our leaving gifts of an Aussie cork hat for me and Dame Edna glasses for Gus. And Bill and Judith (thank god some more Brits) provided the evening's glamour. Cupcakes from the Hummingbird Bakery rounded off the evening and gave some much needed sugar and carb to ward off the hangovers.

Sunday we drove to Manchester in torrential rain. The sun was shining by the time we met Breffni and Finn for afternoon tea at Harvey Nichol's department store in Manchester city centre. Great tea, great company and great views of all the chavs with their Primark bags waiting for a tram.

We were staying at the Great John Street Hotel - a converted school house right next to Granada Studios. Very cool hotel with eclectic decor and a mezzanine bathroom. Also a rooftop terrace with views of the Coronation Street set........exciting only for the Brits I know. We have a pic of Dev's supermarket............

Drinks and dinner with Mr Tim Wilman followed. Sadly Giselle couldn't make it - still poorly after her last trip to China. Tim was his usual ebullient self, regaling us with tales of his heli skiing holiday. Bloody scary. What is it with straight boys and their need to risk life and limb in pursuit of a good time! I can have a perfectly good time lying down! By a pool.....with a drink.

Monday we drove over to Anglesey to leave my car at my mum's. This was the first time Gus had met my mum - fortunately he was too hungover to be nervous. It went well, and we enjoyed our brief visit.

Then the train to London, and coffee at Euston station with Alison. We do know all the in places. Dinner again with Kostas and Tanya, and then more drinks with Rose, Allen and Bev (aka Lady Gaga) who was back from a weekend in St Tropez.

Today we are meeting my kids for afternnoon tea before finally getting on the plane to Sydney.

The start of our big adventure.

To boldly go where .....someone has already been

2009-06-05T06:01:00.000+10:00

Last night we had a farewell meal with our neighbours - Johny & Kerry. We had a Thai takeaway from a place they recommended. Great food. Can't believe it has been open a year and we didn't know about it. We washed it all down with the last of our wine, and quite a bit of theirs. We were all a bit fragile this morning. Fun though. We will miss them, and their delightful kids - Luke, Louis and baby Harley. But most of all we will miss seeing Johny mowing the lawn during the summer - something he always does topless. It's the gay equivalent of the diet coke break.

Today Gus and I went into Reading - there wasn't much to do in the house save look at boxes. We had a full English breakfast and then Gus did a bit of shopping - new farewell outfit from H&M. Then off to the cinema - I wanted to see Terminator 4, but Gus wasn't keen and frankly the thought of all the explosions and robots fighting when I have a hangover was not appealing. So we went with Gus' choice which was Star Trek. Which I saw with Fraser last week. I enjoyed seeing it again though. And Captain Kirk was just as fine second time around.

And we are just back from taking the kids out for a meal. We went to their favourite place - the Toby Carvery. Good old fashioned English roast dinner. And because we were seated before seven pm, it was only £5 a head. Bargain. Can't go wrong with roast beef, roast turkey and all the trimmings for that price.

They came, they saw, they packed

2009-06-04T03:02:00.000+10:00

It's a bit disconcerting -seeing our carefully planned & co-ordinated belongings (furniture and clothes) transformed into a pile of cardboard boxes. Brown is so last season. But that is it. Well mostly - they'll be back on Friday to pack up the bed, telly and computer before the shipping container arrives at noon.

It wasn't too bad. They did a good job of packing - though I guess we'll only really find out how good when it all arrives intact in Sydney. Gus was a bit worried about these heavily tatooed men handling his delicates............that porcelain Russian tea set is quite fragile.

And for the Brits reading this - I've sent off the form to claim back 6 months worth of TV licence. Proof that I am emigrating included. Let's see if the BBC are as willing to give me the money back as they are to take it in the first place. And for my American friends - it is illegal in the UK to watch tv without a licence from the government (well BBC actually). Unless you are an MP when you can claim the cost of the licence, the tv, and the house it sits in all on expenses.

Ready Shreddy Go

2009-06-03T18:38:00.000+10:00

Gus has been in a shredding frenzy. Three bin bags full now. And an overheated and over whelmed shredder. I did have payslips going back to 1989 though.

It's all calm now. Just waiting for the removal men to turn up.

Some like it hot

2009-06-03T06:38:00.000+10:00

but when you are packing your life up to move half way round the world - the hottest day of the year just isn't helpful. The only good thing to happen today is that Gus and I managed not to kill each other - but only just.

We started the day sorting out toiletries - in an attempt to keep our baggage weight down we purged our bathroom collection. It was painful. Throwing out perfectly good shampoos and conditioners that we nicked from 5 star hotels and have never used. And worrying just how many anti ageing & anti wrinkle potions we have. Us gays sure are suckers for marketing. We are worth it though.

Then onto clothes. The packing bit was easy. Deciding what to take was a bit harder. Figuring out what we are going to wear over the next few days so that it could all go in one bag required a level of decision making that was quite frankly beyond me. Big decisions I can do - no problem. Like emigrating. Quite calm about that. Choosing which pair of shoes to wear on the plane has left me in need of counselling.

Amidst all this fashion trauma, I was also trying to sort out my email. I wanted to set up my new shiny netbook to access my email from my remote webmail before the BT internet connection is shut down. Some of you have already lost the will to live just from reading about this. Imagine having to do it. Took me two hours and some choice language before I worked out what I was doing wrong. Do not be misled by my fondness for Doctor Who and Star Trek. I don't normally do technology. I have people to do that for me. Not at home though. And my requests for a sonic screwdriver were ignored by Gus. Some assistant he is!

Then the phone rings. It's the man I rang a few weeks back about mending the dent on my car. I definitely need people to do reversing for me sometimes as I have a habit of hitting fence posts. He was supposed to come round ages ago and give me a quote. He didn't. Now he could. So he turns up and starts sanding, drilling, mixing resin and spray painting. Very butch.

My ex-wife's partner John then arrives to collect all the furniture we sold him - all the furniture of mass destruction that could lead to the end of Australian life. We get the resin man to move his van, and my dented car - back up John's van to the garage and start loading. He's also taking the dishwasher so I go and disconnect it. And get covered in smelly drainage hose gunk. Now I am probably illegal for entry into Australia!

In an English Country Garden

2009-06-01T05:22:00.000+10:00

The English weather is doing its bit to make us feel homesick before we've even left. This weekend the sun shone brightly as we continued our farewell tour. We headed south, to the rolling hills of the North Downs. Beautiful, quintissentially English countryside, and peaceful - provided you ignored the jets landing at Gatwick and the packs of motorcyclists terrorising the locals. Gus drove his Mini (named Miranda...I know...don't even go there) and it was fun bombing down the M4/M25/M23 at illegal speeds with the top down. The wind was blowing in our hair. Well, the wind was blowing in Gus' hair. I felt the breeze on my bald patch.

We went for dinner and stayed overnight with our friends Michael and "Champagne" Jane, whom we met on SeaDream last December. They were the perfect hosts. Especially as they let us watch the Britain's Got Talent final. Their house is stunning with great views and a wine cellar that rivals Oddbins.

We tried our best to make a significant dent in it however. Gus has been a bit fragile today. These youngsters - no stamina.

Spending in style

2009-05-30T02:38:00.000+10:00

Florida girl posted the other day that I should get my wallet out and pay for excess luggage. Well now I just might. Gus has just been out to collect my birthday present - a Louis Vuitton wallet. In their new black check too. It's very fancy, and the perfect place to put all the Aussie money. Thanks babe.

The Long Goodbye

2009-05-30T02:11:00.000+10:00

It's been a funny few days. I took Abi and Fraser up to my mum's in Anglesey - it's about a 5 hour drive away, but as you cross the bridge to the island, you also slip back in time. There is no internet connection and my mum's house is in a Vodafone blackspot. So if I want to use my mobile, I walk down to the beach. where the reception and scenery is perfect. I have felt disconnected all week, especially with so much to organise. Gus has been filling in for me as my PA, as well as working his last shifts at Starbucks.

It was Abi's birthday on Tuesday so we had a birthday tea with delicious M&S chocolate cake. My sister Amanda and her two kids Ethan and Tara arrived on the Wednesday and we had more birthday celebrations - this time with homemade fairy cakes and millionaires shortbread. It was great to see my family again, but it was tinged with sadness. Partly because I am about to move a hell of a long way away, and partly because it is exactly one year since my dad died. We visited the churchyard yesterday and placed flowers on his grave. I said my goodbyes to him too, again, one year on.

And then today, more goodbye's. There are going to be quite a few farewell scenes played out over the next 2 weeks. Could be sad - but then I am British - so I guess it will be more like Brief Encounter. Stiff upper lip and all that.

What not to wear?

2009-05-25T19:20:00.000+10:00

Flights are booked. We are leaving the UK on Tuesday 9th June at 22.30

and we land in Sydney on Thursday 11th June at 06.35am

We have decided to go out in style so we used our Virgin miles to upgrade ourselves to Upper Class. Gus is already planning what to do in the Virgin Clubhouse at Heathrow - spa, jacuzzi, massage, manicure, cocktails, dinner - who actually needs to travel - you could just stay there.

We are facing a packing crisis though. When you fly to the USA, the baggage allowance is 2 pieces (3 in Upper) each of which can weigh up to 25 kg. For flights to Australia and anywhere else East there is a different system. A total weight limit applies, which for us will be 30kg each. Now when we go on a cruise we normally take 2 cases each, so surviving for the 2 months before our shipped belongings turn up presents a real challenge. Gus' haircare regime alone demands its own suitcase.

And we are headed for a winter season........we need a capsule wardrobe - a fashion makeover. We need Gok.

The Naked Chef

2009-05-25T07:20:00.000+10:00

I'm in trouble with Gus.

He read my last post all about my birthday and wanted to know why I hadn't told everyone about the birthday meal he cooked for me. It was a gourmet feast - 6 courses. Nachos, followed by scallops wrapped in bacon, then individual beef wellington, and for dessert - lemon tart with raspberries and creme fraiche. And Guylian praline chocs to round off the meal. All washed down with champagne and Marlborough sauvignon blanc. And as is customary with Gus - it was all beautifully and artfully presented.

Oh - that's right - there are only five courses listed. The sixth? That would be telling.

To boldly go

2009-05-24T19:01:00.001+10:00

Had a break from all things emigratory yesterday. It was my birthday. So I went to the cinema with Fraz to see Star Trek.

Gus was working and it is so not his thing. Fraz and I had a great time - treated ourselves to some Hagen Daz ice cream. The lady at the counter said we could taste any flavours we were unsure of before purchase. We toyed with the idea of tasting them all, but chickened out. So we went for a regular 2 scoop. £3.10! Fraz had cookie dough and caramel chew chew; I went for vanilla toffee crunch and cherry garcia. Extravagant but delicious.

The cinema was very quiet - when we sat down there was only one other person in there. A few others arrived - and took the rows in front of us and behind us. Why? When there is a whole cinema to pick from? And dear god - the couple in the row behind starting snacking on what sounded like a roll of loft insulation. It went on for ever. No wonder they needed the extra large premier seats.

The movie itself was brilliant - one of the best films I have seen in ages. Exciting, funny, sexy.

Just like me.

Kills 99% of known germs

2009-05-22T23:30:00.000+10:00

I've been getting quotes from removal companies to ship all our stuff to Sydney. All a bit last minute, but that's what happens when your visas get approved in 24 hours. Anyway, the removal bit will be exciting as an actual shipping container will arrive outside our house. Sad that I find this fun I know.

Both of the companies who have quoted have confirmed all my research - that mud and dead natural products (wicker, cane, bamboo etc) are shipping no-no's. They have been impressed by my bike grooming - apparently bikes are always inspected thoroughly. The guy today advised that I wipe the bikes down with Jeyes fluid - as the strong smell of ammonia will linger and convince the customs guys that I have done a good enough job. This is clearly the shipping equivalent of Tesco pumping the smell of freshly baked bread around the store to make you feel hungry and buy more. So I might have to go out and buy some Jeyes fluid - there isn't any in the house. Not much bleach left either - Gus has discovered Vanish Oxi action - and has become a bleaching fanatic. If it's white (or used to be) it has been oxi-actioned.

I shouldn't really be surprised - he already bleaches his hair. And you thought he was a natural blond. Thinking about it - working for Aussie Quarantine would be his perfect job - telling people off for their lack of cleanliness. Does it come with a hot uniform?

A roof over our heads

2009-05-21T19:29:00.000+10:00

Got an email this morning from the relocation company - they have booked us a serviced apartment for the first 6 weeks of our new life down under. It is in Balmain - one of the areas we will look for a permanent place in. Balmain is a trendy, quite upmarket place with great cafes, bars and restaurants. Cool shops too. And there is a ferry service from Balmain to the city centre - takes about 10 minutes. Gus will love it there. Hopefully my commute won't be too bad.

Anyway here's some pics of the apartment

View of the city and the Harbour Bridge from the terrace - hopefully we'll get some winter sunshine so we can sit out and enjoy it.

Bike grooming

2009-05-21T03:11:00.000+10:00

Well I have just sprayed WD40 onto all the bits of the bikes that need lubrication.

So in a way, they have been moisturised.

Mud, mud, glorious mud

2009-05-20T22:48:00.000+10:00

A few years back we all got shiny new bikes for Christmas. We used to cycle on Greenham Common, where the Americans stored all their cruise missiles in the 80's. Now it belongs again to the people of Newbury, and the people of Newbury seem to use it mainly as a giant dog toilet. Then, when I bought the holiday home (aka static caravan) in the Cotswolds, the bikes lived there and we had several trips along bridle paths and around the lakes. All of this meant that the bikes were a bit muddy. Had I known we were moving to Australia I would have wrapped the bikes in cling film and left them pristine. Why? Because nothing puts the fear of God into Aussie Customs like mud. Yes mud. Common dirt. Apparently mud represents the greatest threat to the Australian way of life since the arrival of the £10 pom. You would think that a land founded by a bunch of unwashed convicts could cope with a bit of mud - but no.

So the bikes have been jet washed, scrubbed with bicarbonate of soda and then jet washed again. All that's left is for me to moisturise them and their pre-move grooming is complete. And the washing machine is going night and day as we work our way through Gus' trainer collection. Unlike many rap stars (and David Beckham) his trainers are not box fresh. OK - so he needs them for his personal training, but there are trainers drying everywhere. It's like Niketown in here.

Handy wartime advice

2009-05-19T18:39:00.001+10:00

I know I should do this

but every now & then I want to do this

Oh what a beautiful morning......

2009-05-19T17:04:00.000+10:00

What a great start to the day. Our visas have been approved. Hooray. They were only submitted on monday and the lawyer warned us it could take up to 6 weeks. Well it only took 24 hours. The combination of the backing of Woolworths and a shit hot immigration lawyer has worked wonders. And Gus' visa has been approved too - he is now officially regarded by the Australian government as my de facto spouse. It's a virtual marriage. Well that saves on the wedding costs.

And Westpac have accepted our application for a bank account.

All systems go.

Now we need to book the removals and flights outta here.

Moving as therapy

2009-05-19T05:03:00.000+10:00

Anyone reading who has made the move to Australia already knows about the tough and eclectic quarantine regulations. I can understand the desire to protect what is a unique ecosystem - but I do fail to see how my wicker dining chairs from Next pose a threat to Australia's flora and fauna. We could take a risk and pack all this FMD (furniture of mass destruction) hoping that the customs staff are impressed by our sense of interior design. Trouble is - if they put flora and fauna before fixtures and fittings - then the wicker chairs are a no-no. Given that the decontamination costs are apparently enormous and I don't fancy sitting down to eat on something that has been irradiated and probably glows in the dark, we have decided to get rid. And you know us gays - once one element of the look has gone, well the whole thing is ruined. Just ruined.

So we are having a clearout. Gus is in his element. This combines two of his favourite activities - actually three. Cleaning, organising and telling me what to do. My duties seem mainly to involve taking stuff to the tip - or recycling centre as West Berks council now like to call it. The garage is now divided into clearly delineated areas - stuff we are selling, stuff we are giving away, stuff we can actually take with us (worryingly the smallest pile) and stuff for landfill - sorry recycling.

I do wonder how we managed to collect so much in the first place - we could open a hotel with all the bedlinen we have - but all this clearing out is remarkably liberating. And the more we do, the more I realise just how much of an adventure the next few years are going to be.

First post

2009-05-18T06:07:00.000+10:00

Well this is quite exciting. My first blog post. A new experience. I guess there will be quite a few new experiences over the next few months as I relocate my life to Sydney.

I'm moving out there with my partner Gus as I have accepted a new job with one of Australia's biggest retailers - Woolworths. It's a great job and I am thrilled to be joining them, and quite flattered that a company on the other side of the world wants me to be part of their team.

There's only one downside to this move - and it's quite a biggy. I am a divorced dad, and moving so far away from my three kids is going to be tough. At the moment, they are all excited about my move, and busy planning their first trip out to see me. I know that when I have left the UK and we don't see each other every other weekend as usual, that they will start to miss me, as I will miss them. So this blog is a way of keeping in touch with them especially, as well as other family members, friends, and any other internet surfers who happen to stop by.

So the first blog hello goes out to Adam, Fraser and Abigail.

We had a busy day today - myself, Gus, Fraz and Abi - we were at our holiday home in the Cotswolds. Well I say holiday home - it really is a posh static caravan.

Anyway, we spent the day clearing it of all our stuff as I don't think we will be going there again. We have had a lot of fun there - and the coldest Easter ever when the power went out.

That's one more thing crossed off the very long pre-move to do list.